Four years ago we made a major move from the northern-most part of the country, to the southernmost part of the country. Prior to that move, we purged all of our possessions down to the most wanted items - basically only what could fit into one large moving truck and our mini van. As you can imagine, a family of eight can easily accumulate a large quantity of stuff, and we certainly had! We eliminated about two thirds of our possessions, and one of the items that did not make it onto our truck was my piano - it made it's way to my best friend's house instead. I had intended to replace the piano fairly quickly, but wanted a particular type, which limited my options and made the wait take much longer than I had anticipated. This past year, a piano finally found a place in our new home.

I was excited to get back into practice, so I got all of my music out of storage and began to work my way through the collection of musicals, classicals and sacred pieces. I came across a trio that I had sung with my sisters years ago, and played through the lovely arrangement as the words strung their way through my mind:

I'll walk with God from this day on, His helping hand I'll lean upon.

This is my prayer - my humble plea: May the Lord be ever with me.

There is no death, tho' eyes grow dim. There is no fear when I'm near to Him.

 I'll lean on Him forever, and He'll forsake me never.

He will not fail me as long as my faith is strong, whatever road I may walk along.

I'll walk with God, I'll take His hand; I'll talk with God, He'll understand.

I'll pray to Him, each day to Him, and He'll hear the words that I say.

His grace reveals the paths I've trod, now I'll never walk alone while I walk with God!

Hmm

He will not fail me as long as my faith is strong.

He will not fail me - AS LONG AS my faith is strong.

He will not fail me - as long as MY FAITH is strong.

These words haunted my thoughts for days. I guess that when I was a teenager singing this song, my relationship with God was not developed enough for me to notice how flawed the theology is.

It bothered me that the song leaves open the possibility that God would - or even COULD - fail me! That His faithfulness to me is fully dependent on my faithfulness to Him - even though my salvation is fully dependent on Him! It calls the entire covenant into question. When God made the covenant with Abra(ha)m in Genesis 15, only GOD took the oath - He did not obligate Abram to any part of the promise. Abram did not have to do this before God would do that. He just had to trust God. 

 I grew up in the fundamentalist faith, and over the years I have come to realize that there is a strong element of personal responsibility and good works tightly interwoven into the concept of faith and sanctification. There is an element of truth in all of it - we should strive to obey God's Word and to live lives that prove the Gospel rather than hindering it by being "hypocrites." The problem comes when I start counting on my own goodness as if it mattered, and fall into the trap of thinking that my sin is less bad than your sin -  a man-made grading system that we have invented to justify ourselves and make it easy to forget that I need God's mercy just as much as the prostitute or drug peddler down the street. 

The very next Sunday the angst over the words of that song were resolved in the church service as we sang:

I love You, Lord, for Your mercy never fails me. All my days I've been held in Your hands.

From the moment that I wake up until I lay my head, I will sing of the goodness of God.

All my life You have been faithful. All my life You have been so, so good!

With every breath that I am able I will sing of the Goodness of God.

I love Your voice - You have led me through the fire. In the darkest night You are close like no other.

I've known You as a Father, I've known You as a Friend, and I have lived in the goodness of God.

Your goodness is running after, running after me! Your goodness is running after, running after me.

 With my life laid down, I'm surrendered now, I give You everything.

Your goodness is running after, running after me.

All my life you have been faithful. All my life You have been so, so good.

With every breath that I am able, I will sing of the goodness of God!

These words flooded my heart and drew such a contrast between the theologies of the two songs. One song is about me and my faith, and my prayers, and how God will walk with me and hear me and not fail ME. The other song is about God and how He loves us and pursues us and remains faithful to us regardless of anything else. His faithfulness does not depend on anything that I do - it depends fully on His own consistent character. His goodness. His love. His faithfulness. 

And that is something that I can take to the bank. I will fail. My faithfulness to Him will falter. There are times when I am unable (or even unwilling) to pray. It's a really good thing that God's faithfulness does not depend on me!