Let me have my own way, Lord, let me have my own way.
You are the potter, (but don't forget!) I am the clay.
Now mold me and make me - if it doesn't hurt too much or cramp my style.
While I am moving, forging ahead and motor mouth still.
I can still remember back to when I heard those words sung on a Focus on the Family broadcast. Joyce Landorf was talking about being in God's Waiting Room and how frustrating that it could be. I could not have been more than ten years old when this broadcast aired - yet this mocking little song made quite an impression on me! There have been many times when I heard these words in my head, reminding me to yield myself, again, to God.
I am currently in God's Waiting Room, wondering what the future holds for me in my job (or lack of), our family finances, our future here...
Fear begins to show it's ugly head. "What big changes are coming into my life?" I often wonder.
Although God never changes, it seems to be His plan for our lives to be changing constantly: changing the family picture by the addition or subtraction of children, spouses, parents, siblings... Changing the landscape by moving us to different homes, towns, or states. Changing the status of our health, jobs, relationships...
Our lives are always changing. - which seems ironic because most people are extremely uncomfortable with change! Perhaps it is the only way that God can keep us trusting in Him.
A couple of weeks ago, when I was searching through my notebooks looking for the poem about rocking babies, I came across a journal-type entry from another time that I was in God's waiting room. I needed God's direction and guidance then, and I had come across a few verses in Isaiah 30 that made me certain that that guidance would come. It even seemed to give two options for what I could do - wait quietly and patiently so that I could hear that still, small voice when it whispered in my ear, - - or not!
"Their strength [is] to sit still." vs. 7b KJV
"For thus says the Lord God, the Holy One of Israel: 'In returning and rest you shall be saved; In quietness and confidence shall be your strength.' But you would not, " vs. 15
"Your ears shall hear a word behind you, saying, 'This is the way, walk in it,' Whenever you turn to the right hand or whenever you turn to the left." vs. 21
At that time in my life I decided to be quiet and listen. I spent some time in fasting and prayer until I received my guidance from the Lord. This is the prayer that I penned next to those verses in my notebook:
"Lord, I know that You will direct all my steps and that I must sit still and be quiet. Lord, forgive me for running around and talking and fretting and trying to figure out what is going to happen and trying to work things out by myself. Help me to place my confidence in you - I know that I cannot have peace until I do." "Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace who's mind is stayed on thee: because he trusteth in thee. Trust ye in the Lord forever: for in the Lord Jehovah is everlasting strength."Isa 26:3-4.
Right now in my current situation, God seems strangely silent.
I am tired of the waiting room! I want Him to pull me into His office and tell me what to do. "When will you tell me, Lord, when?" I keep saying to Him. Oddly enough, my pastor was preaching to me again this Sunday! He said that God often waits until the last possible moment to bring His deliverance - just so that we will know that it was His doing, not ours. My moment of desperation is getting close. Perhaps God is waiting for that moment so that He can show me what He is capable of.
To remind me that He cares.
That He still provides for my needs today just as he did for the people in the Bible.
To increase my faith.
Maybe He is not keeping silent - maybe He is waiting for just the right moment to sweep in and bring HIS victory! I just have to stay quiet now, listening to hear that voice whispering in my ear, "This is the way, walk in it."
Have thine own way, Lord, have thine own way.
Thou art the potter, I am the clay.
Now mold me and make me after Thy will.
While I am waiting, yielded and still.
God's Waiting Room
Matters of the Heart
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3 comments:
Thank you for sharing! I think if all were honest, that there is always some aspect of life that requires waiting on God and His perfect timing. Some of the waits are just bigger than others.
once again, so funny that you'd be sharing verses that God has pointed out to me (again) recently =)
Stephanie - I decided to share because waiting on God is something that we all have to do from time to time so I knew that others would undoubtedly be able to relate! I am guessing that you have been doing so recent waiting... Thank you for your comments.
Joy - I can't even guess how many times that happens to me, too! So often I will read an article, come across verses, hear a message or a song - all on the same theme, and always something that I need to hear at that time. Our pastor was talking about how God speaks to us and he told how a friend had been telling him that every time he went in a store, turned on his car, got home, etc. the radio was playing a song called "stronger," Our pastor asked him what he was struggling with in his life right then and he said, "I just feel so weak." It's amazing that God can use a bunch of little tiny things to teach us what he wants us to know.
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