Love From the Heart. No, Stomach

I am not a very good cook. Shocking, I know, coming from a Martha. Of course I did not say that I am not a good cook - I don't burn things too often or make food that tastes terrible, I am just not a very good cook.

My husband is.

Everyone wants to come to our house for Thanksgiving - and it is not because of me! He can put on a beautifully presented, multi-course meal without breaking a sweat. He is one of those amazing people who can taste something and know what is missing or what would make it better. He can throw things into a pot and it comes out tasting good. I, however, am chained to my recipes.

He has this wonderful recipe for home made spaghetti and meatballs. You start with tomato paste and water (and other things) then reduce it down over a period of three hours. One day I got out the recipe and tried to make it for dinner while he was at work. It did not taste like it does when he makes it.
"It's missing something," I said when he got home, "But I followed the recipe exactly."
I watched as he put in suprizing things like red wine and sugar. "I always add stuff to it." he said.
 "You should write it on the recipe, then." I replied.
"That's OK." he responded,  "I'll just make it on the weekends."
If you read I think I'm in Like you probably figured out that my husband's "Love Language" is "acts of service."

You know that old saying "the way to a man's heart is through his stomach"? While that may not be true for every man, it certainly is true for my man! My man is the kind of man who appreciates a good meal. Flaverful. Savory. With meat. Don't throw a pile of leaves in front of him or a bowl of pasta or vegetabes. Although he enjoys those as a small side dish, that is not a meal. Neither is a cassarole. Bleh! When I take the time to prepare a meal that he can enjoy, he feels loved and cared for.

I like him. I want to keep him. I want him to feel loved and cared for!

...But it's just so hard for me!

One year for Christmas my sister gave him an Emeril cookbook (he has downloaded dozens of Emeril's recipes and duplicated them over the years). In my efforts to be a loving wife I got out the book one day thinking that I would make a dinner that he would love. I looked through the book, noting the numerous prepatory steps and special ingredients and said outloud to no one in particular, "Ain't gonna happen." I haven't touched that cookbook since!

My idea of a good cookbook is 1001 Things to do With a Pound of Hamburger. (Does such a book exsist - if so call me!) I don't want to be bothered with complicated menus - my kids will just turn their noses up at it anyway! If I can look forward to complaints from at least half of my family no matter what I prepare, why should I be inconvenievced by preparing something special?

It is this mindset that has kept me mediocre in the kitchen for years. Now it is time to change. The Holy Spirit has been convicting me of my kitchen mediocrity.

Well, not exactly.

But He has been showing me that to really love my husband the way that Christ wants me to, I need to step it up in the kitchen. And so I am trying. I am learning that it does not really take any more time to prepare a good meal as it does to throw together a bowl of pasta - provided I start early enough in the day rather than running to the kitchen an hour before my husband is scheduled to arrive at home and frantically pulling items from the pantry that can be thrown together for an obviously hastily prepared meal.

A meal that speaks to my husband and says, "I do not care enough about you to put some effort into it."

Instead I want my meals to say, "I was thinking of you today and chose to prepare a meal that would be satisfying after a long day of work because I care about you."

That is why pork loin and chicken cattiatore are on the menu this week. And today?

"Perfect Pot-roast" is in the oven...


Julie said...

Via Katie-

You cannot go wrong with the perfect pot roast. My hubby loves it and it does not take longer than a normal roast to do. I hope it goes great for you.

~~~~ said...

I love having a hubby that cooks. At our house we both like to cook and so the only trouble comes when we both are wanting to be in the kitchen...and word to the wise...There can only be ONE CHEF. LOL! Love your blog!

Aaron said...

Cooking something nice is always a plus...Jill is really good at it. I will have to send you something that doesnt take too long, cost too many calories and is REALLY GOOD! That the kids would probably like too. Us Vander Zons are picky eaters.

Im like you. I look at all that is needed and freak out.....and end up going out to eat. I planned a nice meal for V-day while Jill was in class and found myself wandering aimlessly around the grocery store trying to find things and ended up running out of time.

Can you send the recipe for Johns homemade spaghetti stuff. I will get the additional details from him......

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